Unexpected
We grow up learning two things constantly reminded to us by our parents and by life: work hard for what you want and don't leave anything up to fate. Life will break us, fix us, destroy us and rebuild us over and over again in an endless cycle playing like a continuous unrhytmical loop. Simultaneously, we are led to believe that it all happens for a reason and that we need to learn from our mistakes and that what doesn't kill us make makes us stronger and that, is the same monotonous crap we've all heard of at least a thousand times. With this we are designed unconsciously to fear the unexpected. We as humans appreciate surprises, when they are positive, but we rarely put ourselves in a place that allows us to be surprised. We expect the bad, do our best to ensure the good, but completely forget the mysterious, which is in most cases, the great.
You my love are the biggest risk I have taken. Everything about you told me to walk away, everyone around me told you to run, and yet, here we are. I find myself completely astounded by this turn of events my life took from the first night I laid my kiss on your lips, because it doesn't make sense. You go against everything I had learnt. You represented that fate we all run from, that mystery we all avoid, and that surprise we are all too scared of.
Like a rutinary activity, we wake up, fight, love, drink, fuck, fail, succeed and go back to sleep. This used to be my life. The one I got used to, and by trying to misuse it with a meaningless one night stand with some girl that made my heart burst with every beat, I ended up obsessed with the ''what could be'' that came that morning after. I was vulnerable, with a heart wide open to pain to avoid feeling lonely. I was hoping to murder my need for sentiment and depth, and instead ended up drowning my lonely nights and the lack of pure joy that comes with waking up next to something spectacular beyond comprehension. That smile when you look at me as I kiss you into the beginning of the day, that's the most perfect moment I have ever experienced, and every morning is even better than the one before, like there is some flaw to be corrected. I always thought that what's perfect cant change, what I didn't realize, is that it can grow.
We shouldn't leave things up to fate, and I'm glad I've learnt to fight for what I want, but with you I've learnt that sometimes we shouldn't think so much about figuring out what it is that we actually want because even though 99% of the times we don't things go terribly wrong, there is always a 1% chance something, or someone, will come into our lives, and change it forever. You are my 1%, my surprise, the exception to the rule, and the girl I am extremely proud of calling my own. I love you baby.